Maui finally gets its Morrissey show. His melancholy 80s tunes paved the way for the millennium’s emo set. Some say he created the space for all indie alt rock. His politics have made his music famous and notorious, from “Meat is Murder” to “Girlfriend in a Coma.” Pre-show dinner will be vegetarian fare by Stella Blues. 7:30pm. Tickets $49.50, $59.50, $69.50. Castle Theatre, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

TUESDAY, MAY 15 – There’s a school of thought (one not particularly popular in mainstream America) that says the private property rights that take such precedence in Western capitalist market-oriented democracy are detrimental to our world’s environmental health and are, in fact, in direct opposition to how our society should interact with nature. As the first event in a four-part series called “Man/Woman and Nature: Restoring the Balance,” Thomas Linzey of the non-profit Community Environmental Legal Defense Fund and Kapua Sproat of EarthJustice will speak about how we can help restore a more beneficial relationship between humanity and the planet. $10. 7pm. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org; alakukui.org

Photo: NASA/Wikimedia Commons

HAWAIIAN MUSIC SHOWCASE – Is there anything George Kahumoku, Jr. can’t do? He’s a Grammy-winning musician who makes beautiful music puts on a hell of a show at the MACC and the Napili Kai and spins records on IslandFM (107.5 FM). Oh, he’s also the director of UH Maui College’s Institute of Hawaiian Music, which showcases its first tri-annual student concert this week. You want sublime but still fun Hawaiian music? This is the place to be. $20 general / $10 students and seniors / free for keiki 12 and under. 7:30pm. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

Here’s your chance to see works of art created by students across Maui, from kindergarten through the 8th grade in both public and private schools. It’s an annual exhibit, which this year is called “Visual Storytelling.” The art is, as always, colorful, exciting, surprising and inspiring. Show runs through May 20. Free. Daily, 11am-5pm. Schaefer International Gallery at the MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

Photo: Wikimedia Commons

THIS JUST IN: BAMP PROJECT PRESENTS MORRISSEY LIVE ON MAUI AND OAHU

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>>> Tickets go on sale this Fri., Mar. 9 at 9am. If you quit eating and smiling between now and then, you’ll be sufficiently emaciated and depressed enough to attend the show (Morrissey’s first in 20 years–see the BAMP press release below). Meanwhile, here’s all you need to know:

MAUI SHOW – Fri., May 18, 7pm doors / 7:30pm show, A&B Amphitheater / Yokouchi Pavilion, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org; $49.50 / $59.50 / $69.50 plus applicable fees

OAHU SHOW – Sat., May 19, 7pm doors/ 8pm show, Kaka’ako Waterfront Park Amphitheater (Kaliko Dr., Wahiawa); groovetickets.com / bampproject.com; first 250 general admission tickets are $39.50 / after that, advance general admission tickets are $45 / $99.50 VIP (21+ only), plus applicable fees

>>> Addendum: It occurred to me that my dry attempt at humor and lack of poetic paraffin (I know I’m misinterpreting that phrase for the sake of alliteration, but bear with me) may not make clear the fact that I’m stoked Morrissey’s coming to Maui. If you feel the same, I like you even better now. But hell, if you do feel the same, you don’t need me to tell you about Morrissey! You don’t need me to tell you that “Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want” still makes me weep for Duckie (even more than Jon Cryer is for forever playing second fiddle sidekick, first to a coked-up Charlie Sheen then to that pretty idiot from Punk’d). You don’t need me to tell you that oft when eating meat I hear a song in my head that reminds me I’m accessory to murder… You’ve got your own (and very likely better) stories. So, like I said before, what matters is the Ws above. Parting words: I look forward to flopping around all hipsterish with you and talking about how fuckin’ awesomely nostalgic it all is. See you there.

Here’s this morning’s press release from our pals at BAMP:

HONOLULU, HI – (Monday, March 5, 2012) – BAMP Project, Hawaii’s premier concert production company, is proud to present one of the most influential figures in alternative rock, Morrissey, live in concert 20 years after his first Hawaii performance.  The former lead singer of The Smiths and one of the most influential icons of all time will perform May 18 on Maui and May 19 on Oahu with tickets on sale Friday, March 9 at 9:00 a.m.

Since launching his solo career in 1987, Morrissey has released nine studio albums, sold out concerts in minutes and sold millions of records worldwide. His first two solo singles, “Suedehead” and the gorgeous “Everyday Is Like Sunday,” were significant global hits in 1988 and his first album, Viva Hate (its title a reference to the Smiths’ breakup), was commercially and critically well-received.  He released several more high-quality singles, including “The Last of the International Playboys” and “Interesting Drug.”

His 1992 album Your Arsenal easily ranked as the hardest-rocking of his career, or at least, that was overshadowed in England; over in the U.S., tickets for his upcoming tour were selling like hotcakes and he managed to sell out L.A.’s Hollywood Bowl even faster than the Beatles had.  His American success helped Morrissey deliver an equally strong fourth album 1994′s calmer Vauxhall and I, which even got him his first Top 50 singles-chart entry in the U.S. with the MTV-supported “The More You Ignore Me, the Closer I Get.”  His ninth studio album, Years Of Refusal, released in 2009 saw Morrissey tie his highest U.S. chart debut on the Billboard 200.

Listed as one of the most important musicians in the last three decades, Morrissey made a significant impact on music creating a trail for dozens of modern day alternative rock acts like Radiohead, The Killers and Jeff Buckley all claiming to have been influenced by Morrissey’s music and songwriting.

Text the world “CONCERTS” to 38714 for free Hawaii Concert info.

“In my opinion, Morrissey disembodies every horrible trait that a human can possible possess.”

“The views of the most vocal vegetarian in pop music are typically uncompromising…”

CAKE

SAT., FEB. 25 – Since their early ‘90s debut, Cake’s become a name to conjure with–though the meaning behind their name doesn’t reference dessert. “It’s like when something insidiously becomes a part of your life,” said frontman John McCrea of the band’s moniker, in a 1996 Chicago Sun-Times interview. “We mean it more as something that cakes onto your shoe and is just sort of there until you get rid of it.” As irony would have it, music lovers have been quick to not only keep Cake around, but exalt them–and for good reason. Cake’s sound is a postmodern mash of genre-bending rock, funk, Iranian folk, mariachi and more; replete with smartly sarcastic lyrics–done with deadpan execution–and quirky hallmarks like their use of the vibraslap (a percussive piece that’s rooted in instruments made of animal jawbones’ teeth rattling in loose sockets). And just when you thought Cake couldn’t get any cooler, their sole post (currently) under their website’s “weekly” header reads, “GOD — Republican presidential candidates Rick Perry, Herman Cain, Michele Bachmann, and Rick Santorum each have detailed stories about where and when and what they were doing when God instructed them to run for president. Why is God doing this?” Point is, we’ll see you at the show. Pre-show dinner made available by Three’s Bar & Grill. $39 / $49 / $89. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

THREE CHEERS FOR PINK MARTINI

FRI., FEB. 17 – Portland’s Pink Martini is one of the few ensembles on Earth that can sculpt music into something that’s visceral yet palatial, rooted yet transmuted. And MauiTime’s own Ynez Tongson is one of the few writers on-isle who uses language in a way that’s supremely lithe and sparklingly on-point. So, we’re going to leave it to Tongson to describe Pink Martini (as she did the last time the 12-piece was on Maui, in March 2010): “If you’ve never had the joy of being intoxicated by Pink Martini, imagine how pop would sound if it met a time traveler and a linguist–and later, all three of them decided to go out for drinks. Do that, and you’ve got a pretty good idea of what it’s like to listen to [their] music that’s globally, historically and emotionally diverse. One moment you’re a signorina, shyly declaring your love in an Italian cafe, and the next you’re an unshaven hombre in Spain, laying in the gutter, clutching an empty bottle of red wine, trying to light your cigarillo. Whatever mood you’re in—happy, lovestruck, hopeful, cynical, sad, annoyed—Pink Martini’s got something you could toast to.” (PS: Arrive early for the pre-show dinner made available by Makawao Rodeo General Store, and stay late for the after-glow party in the Yokouchi Pavilion with music by Gene and Shea Argel.) $35 / $45 / $65. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

RASTA THOMAS’ BAD BOYS OF DANCE

THU., FEB. 16 – The Bad Boys of Dance is “a fresh, new dance company comprised of the most talented and versatile young male dancers in the world today… each hand selected [for] his extraordinary physical abilities and artistry.” The company’s founder Rasta Thomas says he started the group “to show the world what great male dancing looks like and to make dancing fun, entertaining and accessible to a whole new generation,” and describes his company men as “the dancers of tomorrow… hot, young and fresh to death… ‘hybrids’ that can do it all–from ballet to hip hop–[with] an unparalleled ability to morph from one style to another and are entertaining and exciting to watch.” $12 / $30 / $40. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org / rastathomas.com

TONIGHT: The Airborne Toxic Event at the Maui Arts & Cultural Center

FRI., JAN. 20 – Sorry hippies, this isn’t an event about Chemtrails–it’s a concert by the Los Angeles-based hipster band acronymically known as TATE (named after section two of Don DeLillo’s book White Noise). “I’m trying to get down an emotion, a scene or a setting,” says frontman Mikel Jollett, of songwriting (in the band’s online “biography of sorts”). “Everything important that happens after that happens between the music and the listener; the rest of it is all mythology. The collective interpretation of it is way more important than what I think.” $23.50 / $28.50 / $55.50. 8pm. Castle Theater, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

SHERYL COOPER’S 3RD ANNUAL HOLIDAY MASTER DANCE CLASS (FOR CHARITY!)

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THU., DEC. 29 – Learn sweet steps from Sheryl Cooper at these charitable dance classes. And, yes. We mean Sheryl Cooper as in Alice Cooper’s wifey of 35 years. She’s danced in videos for her hubby, Aerosmith, The Bee Gees and Peter Frampton, and studied with some of the dance community’s most notable, like Ruth Page, Robert Joffrey, Joe Tremaine, Glen Tetley and Michael Kidd. Plus, her professional credits include California’s Pasadena Dance Theater and Chicago’s Hubbard Street Dance Company, as well as work with the likes of Goldie Hawn, Steve Martin, George C. Scott and the late great Jackie Gleason. Three classes beginning at 6pm. $15 each class / $30 all three classes. Proceeds benefit the Alice Cooper Solid Rock Foundation. Omori Studio A, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); RSVP by calling 280-0047; alicecoopersolidrock.com